Missed something? Sketchbook | Stories | Dispatches | Series
Welcome to Dispatch no. 17. These are usually drafted between other stories – though, I broke that paradigm by including a single, true story in Dispatch 16. If you haven’t read it, it’s a fun one.
So, today, since I’m still taking a break from publishing new stories (nuance: still writing, just not publishing) I thought you might indulge me in a diversion from the typical non-sequiturs to, well, sequiturs? That’s not right. How about a series of missives that have a common thread: moving images.
Enjoy —
Unsteadicam - In 1975, inventor Garret Brown unveiled the ultimate fluid camera mount, the Steadicam. His legacy is assured as the Steadicam has become ubiquitous to film and television production. Unless you’re living under a rock, you’ve heard of or seen one in action. For background, you can watch some of the best Steadicam shots in movie history here and here.
20-ish years after the Steadicam debuted to much fanfare a damned fool entrusted one of these very expensive rigs to a neophyte…me. It didn’t go well. In this clip you’ll see my POV as I fail to navigate a hallway, at speed. I had so much inertia my poor spotter fell on top of me (thanks John!). I’m told the damage was in the thousands-of-dollars. But, hey, at least the footage survived!
Note: Don’t turn up the volume, this video is silent. MOS for cinephiles.Dubbelju - My friend Wolfgang rented motorcycles in San Francisco for more than 20 years. That little shop, Dubbelju, on Shotwell near the Mission District, was more than a rental house, it was a gathering spot, an institution among bikers throughout the bay. From all over the world riders would fly in and pick up a bike just to go cruise the incredibly scenic backroads only a few miles away.
One day I dropped in for a chinwag and he said, “You know, I’ve never made a video for my shop.” So, the next weekend a couple of us shot a quick promo featuring Wolfgang.1D Movie Summer - The summer after high school, grunge was still king, I had a terrible haircut and got a job on a low-budget film. Well, “job” might be a stretch—I wasn’t actually paid.
The director called it an “alien T&A movie.” Aliens and boobies!? What teenager wouldn’t work in the blazing Arizona sun for that? As the crew shrank to just the director, his girlfriend, and me, I had to take on multiple roles: camera, lighting, sound, makeup, props, and special effects. I even played an alien – I’m one of the three aliens in the poster below.
Technically, this might have been the last full length movie lensed on Super8 film. For you film nerds it was shot with a Beaulieu with crystal sync and sound recorded on a DAT. Jebus, those words are ancient history on their own.
I don’t think the director or the financier, his dad, ever made their money back. There was no premiere, no fanfare. In fact, the IMDB page is mostly blank and I only found one review:This movie primarily exists to serve up tits and blood, in this respect it is successful as there plenty of both on display. The gore effects are simple, relegated to copious amounts of the blood splashed on actors. The aliens use a simple and cost effective telekinesis to kill their targets. The alien costumes themselves look surprisingly good when lit correctly but fail to impress when shot in bright light. The less said about the miniature work and the Super Soakers disguised as ray guns the better.
If that doesn’t convince you to stay away, you can find it here.
Tempus Fugit - I owe my love of the desert to a childhood in Arizona. What can I say, wide open spaces just seem to scratch an invisible itch.
In 2019 I noticed I wasn’t accruing anymore PTO — I had reached my limit. So, I did what anyone might, called my father and said, “Let’s go to Mexico!” And we did. For a solid month he and I bombed around on our motorcycles. Outside of returning home in a month, our schedule was loose; we stopped where we wanted, ate road food, watched the sun sail across the sky and took in the beautiful, desolate scenery of Baja. Oh, and had some father & son time along the way.
Baja
Music
Panoramic - Lusine
Balmy Heights - Heavy Joy
Essential Albums: Paul’s Boutique
TBR
Invisible Ink - Brian McDonald
Words
Sadly, Wolfgang’s shop is no more. Closures due to COVID shut him down after 23 years. But, rest assured, he’s still riding but also doing a bit more relaxing in his retirement. He even has an airbnb somewhere near Gulala, CA. If you stop in, tell Wolfgang hi for me.
...alien vows just taking time to find its audience...
Thanks for the shoutout! Also, that tumble may have been expensive, but that documentation is priceless. 🤣